obstinate.org

Here’s the deal, I don’t understand people.  Over the past few months the world has been riddled with examples of people demonstrating total savagery. Austie and I had over and over again realized that the vast majority of humanity has this overwhelming urge to totally screw over everyone else.

The first example of this that I can remember making the conclusion about was the story about the giant oil tanker that was stolen by Somali Pirates a few months back. Now, the piracy itself is pretty ruthless – but it has a very clear goal. The dudes want some sweet moola, and uncle rico ain’t giving it up without a fight, hence the kidnapping of uncle rico’s sweet crude. What really interested me about the piracy was the fact that the Muslim community in Mogadishu decided to attack the pirates. One would think that the reason that they would risk thier lives would be so they could get in on some of the sweet crude. That way they could sell it to the white man and buy his 13 wifes and 4 children a few bowls of rice.

No sir! Not even close. These dudes were intent on exterminating the pirates, not to get in on the action, nor to save the the sweet crude, nor even to right the worlds injustice and live in a better world filled with zen and virgins. In fact, they had decided that because the tankers home port was in Saudi Arabia, and very specifically that the owner was the Saudi royal family that this was a direct attack on Islam and as such exercised article 13 of the Jihad code, allowing them to run around chopping off heads with no spiritual repercussions.

What the frick is wrong with these people?

Let’s be clear that this is only one of many many examples over the past few months. Over many discussions, and beer – I have come to the conclusion that Jesus, yes Jesus is the result of this. Well, Jesus and Gandhi, or the other Gandhi wannabees and more specifically the modern lack thereof. It has been well proven that big jerks that stab people in the face and ask questions later when a strange Neanderthal comes into your cave were the big survivors, which means that you, me, and everyone around us are all descendants of ruthless and uncontrollable savages. The Gandhi’s and Jesus’ were all skewered by the Neanderthals who needed to make sure that Jesus didn’t try to trick his Jane into giving Jesus the last of the Mammoth Confit.

You think I kid, of course we aren’t like this in the civilized world. After years of Agriculture, Democracy, and 5 variations of Grand Theft Auto that the world would be rid of their pent up rage. Are you kidding me, have you ever been to a Rodeo? Now be warned that I am in Texas and as far as the “civilized world” is concerned that the dataset I have here is pretty skewed. On the news last night, and I promise you this was real. The field-reporter was talking to this dude who had his neighbor’s house broken into by a couple of undesirables in Dallas. This would of been a bummer, because this man’s friend would of lost his favorite high school football trophy and the moose head mounted on his wall.

Lucky for him, he didn’t – instead the man who lived next door pulled out a shotgun and shot the two kids dead. Now, here is the kicker – he called the police when he saw the thief’s breaking into the house – he was on the phone with the 911 operator saying “I’m going to shoot them” and “you better get someone out here before I shoot them”. This was all replayed for my pleasure this morning mind you – so the guys come out of the house, you hear the guy say “you had better send an ambulance”, and then a cocking of the shotgun and two shots.

The killer’s own account indicates that the thief’s were RUNNING AWAY when he shot them. Clearly, by watching and listening to the interview with this guy, he found an opportunity where he could kill some undesirables with no repercussions. You see, in Texas there is this thing calls a “Castle Law” that gives you the rights to shoot people in the face if they are on your property.

I imagine that I could run into a random stranger on this planet and have a conversation that went something like this:

MJ: Sup dude
Basheek: I will fight you.
MJ: uhhhhhh
Basheek: I will fight you.
MJ: I’ve got nothing

I am sick of this macho business. I would much prefer to go with a passive aggressive intellectual superiority than go around flexing, you see – I can’t stab you in the face because while I am in shape – it is round, which means that you will evade me. However, I can smirk with all my internal satisfaction without the disappointment of having to suppress my clumsiness to try and operate a weapon. I’d like my confit back, please.