As you may have read prior here. I attended a training seminar hosted by Certfirst / SaiFirst – a company that among other things, trains in PostgreSQL. I posted a full, and accurate review of the course prior on my site, which can be located here:

http://obstinate.org/computing/full-review-of-postgresql-certfirst-training-course/
http://obstinate.org/technology/certfirst-postgresql-training-course-avoid-at-all-costs/

The company I was working for was in negotiations with Certfirst in order to organize a refund. Certfirst located my original posting and demanded that what I had said was libelous and insisted on me removing my posting of my personal opinion, on my personal website, in order for them to agree to a refund on a failure to deliver services.

Certfirst and the company I was working for agreed, and asked me politely to take down my posting. In the effort of avoiding drama. I did such that.

However, I no longer work at said company and I am no longer obligated to keep my opinions off of the internets. As such – let this be a reminder to avoid the usage of Certfirst in any engagement at all costs. They failed to deliver on expectations set. So again, avoid doing business with them at all costs!

What does the right thing mean? Well – I think that is different for every person, and tragically enough, what one person justifies as the right thing can end up hurting others, a lot. I think that generally, in the end, we all understand right and wrong. It is just that some people choose to ignore these basic facts of humanity and continue on a selfish and destructive course, and to hell with the consequences. It is amazing to observe people justify actions in their mind. Are they thinking? Who knows.

Basic evolutionary psychology dictates that humans need to be jerks in order to survive. It is a tragedy that we didn’t all turn out that way and have an insufferable ability to put up with it, and to dish it out in-like.

I propose that a more valiant objective should embraced, we should all strive to increase the general happiness of the world. Everyone deserves to be happy, but instead, everyone seems to be miserable. Some people even lavish in it, roll up in unhappiness like a blanket. Or to make a more appropriate metaphor: a pig in filth. Only that is not enough, in order to satisfy their filth everyone else needs to be filthy also!

Life is a set of encounters that we have for 72.5 years until we die. Why not make the best of it, cherish it? Because greed gets the better of everyone – nearly always. Darwin was right: sex prevails. Sadly, today I am a cynic. Tomorrow is always another day.

She was so nice, the sex was great, always had a great time, it was fantastic… except she had a beard.
Life is full of compromise, DURRRRR. It is okay to be an utter failure, just don’t try to make up for it by blaming it on your mothers uncle – and take some responsibility. I promise it’s your fault.

The Restaurant was fantastic, the meal was delicious and well priced, except the chef likes to set patrons’ hair on fire with blowtorches for fun occasionally.

If you screwed up, admit it. Don’t blame the fact that you knifed someone in the face on your genes, or the attitude that the telephone operator gave you, or the bitter latte you just chugged down from the local liberal-arts coffee house.

This is not limited to just personalities, I constantly see this sort of behavior in sales, and other business departments that are incentivized by producing an good image. The problem with this is that there is an image arms-race and as a result, everyone lies. Talking to a group of potential vendors is like watching apes fight over the last banana, they will say or do anything to get a piece of action – including lying through their teeth and making up for it later with a layer of more lies explaining the previous lies by punting the blame onto someone, or something e’s terriblee.

He was a great friend, always a great laugh and up for a party… except he does like to murder people with swords every now and again.

People should just be honest and up front.  Let the opposite party call it how they see it. I promise you that in the end the recipient of the honesty will always be more satisfied with the information you have delivered as opposed to punting responsibility with a series of excuses.

The Titanic was an epically fantastic ship, except for a small problem with the rudder.

The first example of this that I can remember making the conclusion about was the story about the giant oil tanker that was stolen by Somali Pirates a few months back. Now, the piracy itself is pretty ruthless – but it has a very clear goal. The dudes want some sweet moola, and uncle rico ain’t giving it up without a fight, hence the kidnapping of uncle rico’s sweet crude. What really interested me about the piracy was the fact that the Muslim community in Mogadishu decided to attack the pirates. One would think that the reason that they would risk thier lives would be so they could get in on some of the sweet crude. That way they could sell it to the white man and buy his 13 wifes and 4 children a few bowls of rice.

No sir! Not even close. These dudes were intent on exterminating the pirates, not to get in on the action, nor to save the the sweet crude, nor even to right the worlds injustice and live in a better world filled with zen and virgins. In fact, they had decided that because the tankers home port was in Saudi Arabia, and very specifically that the owner was the Saudi royal family that this was a direct attack on Islam and as such exercised article 13 of the Jihad code, allowing them to run around chopping off heads with no spiritual repercussions.

What the frick is wrong with these people?

Let’s be clear that this is only one of many many examples over the past few months. Over many discussions, and beer – I have come to the conclusion that Jesus, yes Jesus is the result of this. Well, Jesus and Gandhi, or the other Gandhi wannabees and more specifically the modern lack thereof. It has been well proven that big jerks that stab people in the face and ask questions later when a strange Neanderthal comes into your cave were the big survivors, which means that you, me, and everyone around us are all descendants of ruthless and uncontrollable savages. The Gandhi’s and Jesus’ were all skewered by the Neanderthals who needed to make sure that Jesus didn’t try to trick his Jane into giving Jesus the last of the Mammoth Confit.

You think I kid, of course we aren’t like this in the civilized world. After years of Agriculture, Democracy, and 5 variations of Grand Theft Auto that the world would be rid of their pent up rage. Are you kidding me, have you ever been to a Rodeo? Now be warned that I am in Texas and as far as the “civilized world” is concerned that the dataset I have here is pretty skewed. On the news last night, and I promise you this was real. The field-reporter was talking to this dude who had his neighbor’s house broken into by a couple of undesirables in Dallas. This would of been a bummer, because this man’s friend would of lost his favorite high school football trophy and the moose head mounted on his wall.

Lucky for him, he didn’t – instead the man who lived next door pulled out a shotgun and shot the two kids dead. Now, here is the kicker – he called the police when he saw the thief’s breaking into the house – he was on the phone with the 911 operator saying “I’m going to shoot them” and “you better get someone out here before I shoot them”. This was all replayed for my pleasure this morning mind you – so the guys come out of the house, you hear the guy say “you had better send an ambulance”, and then a cocking of the shotgun and two shots.

The killer’s own account indicates that the thief’s were RUNNING AWAY when he shot them. Clearly, by watching and listening to the interview with this guy, he found an opportunity where he could kill some undesirables with no repercussions. You see, in Texas there is this thing calls a “Castle Law” that gives you the rights to shoot people in the face if they are on your property.

I imagine that I could run into a random stranger on this planet and have a conversation that went something like this:

MJ: Sup dude
Basheek: I will fight you.
MJ: uhhhhhh
Basheek: I will fight you.
MJ: I’ve got nothing

I am sick of this macho business. I would much prefer to go with a passive aggressive intellectual superiority than go around flexing, you see – I can’t stab you in the face because while I am in shape – it is round, which means that you will evade me. However, I can smirk with all my internal satisfaction without the disappointment of having to suppress my clumsiness to try and operate a weapon. I’d like my confit back, please.

Then today on my way home from hanging out with a friend, I hear it again. A different ad for the same website.  ”Have an affair to remember, or your membership is free! ashleymadison.whatever”. What is wrong with society that this sort of thing is not only in demand, but is acceptable online. 

It disgusts me to know that there are so many nieve, damaged, and upset people out there who are in relationships. Here is an idea – BE HONEST WITH YOUR PARTNER, don’t lead them on, it isn’t fair. If you want to fuck other men/women – leave them and figure it out, don’t cheat, and use them ‘until you find something better’. Have some compassion for humanity.

I seriously feel filthy after hearing this ad. I am going to go wash my hands. 

Another thing is offices that have no public parking, and im not talking about downtown high rises where space is a serious issue. Here in west LA there is a plethora of buildings that are not stressed for space but charge for parking anyways. Why? because they can. It dawned upon me the other day when I was cleaning out my car and I had like 15 parking receipts. People should just charge the price all-inclusive without tricking people.

I had heard awhile back that in the mid-west some local politician passed an ordinance requiring movie theaters to advertise the actual time that the movie was started, instead of the industry standard of advertising the time that the 30 minutes of commercials start. This is a step in the right direction, kudos.

So this dude is talking this party up on his work, how the funding process works and the type of work they do. The kind of work he was doing, was very un-spectacular to say the least. The types of things he was working on was very ‘middle of the road’ in terms of complexity. Furthermore – he went on to boast that all he had to do to get this big funding was to get ‘a few papers published’ so that he could report something back to the government grant comitee a the end of the year.  I was disgusted.  I left the party.

This sort of attitude would never cut it in the corporate world – where results are what pay the bills.  Must be nice to live in a world where you are judged on just ’showing up’ – reminds me when I was 8.

I have to wonder if the government pays into these sort of research programs with no hope of any sort of meaningful return? This reminds me of a grand parents that pays their kid to do chores around the house – it’s sort of an excuse to give them money, because in the long run you know that they will have some sort of benefit from it.